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BY CHAPTER

(Scroll down for individual pages.)

Prologue
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
A mystery man named Theodore announces some sort of devilish 'game.' A short, mysterious introduction the rest of the story.

Jack Ballard rejected a party invite from an old friend. This of course, cannot be. How Jack Ballard comes to be the main character, an introduction to the main players.

 

There is a lot for Vitus and Jack to do. Places to go, people to see, buildings to scale like leggy spiders. Wait, what? Darren Langley is invited to a great party, that Jack, Vitus and company are all going to! Sounds like a swell time!
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Jack settles into his new undead life, as the Circle finishes its goal- four new vampires for the four lineages. However, trouble is definitely brewing... That trouble? It's here now. Theodore makes good on his promise, lo these many comics ago. Bad/crazy/violent times are had by all. The progenitors hide as Demetri alone tries to bring Theodore down. Meanwhile Theodore attempts to recruit Jack as his second in command. Will either party succeed?
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Nine and a Half
Chapter Ten
The Circle seems to settle down, with Theodore gone for the moment. Jack and friends have fun and relax, well, other than being creeped out by urban legends about serial killers. That's not real though, right? Theodore and his new friends have arrived, but Theodore is occupied with helping sickly Jack. What will Santi and company do while Theo is busy and will Jack's friends find him before Theodore becomes too great an influence? Jack meets up with an old flame and they discuss their conflicting views of the past and try to figure out what it means for the present. A look into Jack's past. On a whim, Jack tries out a newfound power which leads to riches and GLOBAL CHAOS! Meanwhile, vampires are plotting, humans are scheming, and everyone starts to throw down like they're never gonna pick it up again!

 

 

BY INDIVIDUAL PAGE
 

PROLOGUE

Prologue - Title
P - 1 - In which we meet Theodore Leighton.
P - 2 - In which Theodore announces the game.
P - 3 - In which things are quite mysterious.
P - 4- In which the titular bird makes its debut.

CHAPTER ONE

Ch 1 - Title
Ch 1 - 1 - In which we meet our hero.
Ch 1 - 2 - In which our hero arrives at the party.
Ch 1 - 3 - In which our hero is diverted.
Ch 1 - 4 - In which our hero meets Vitus Whitestone.
Ch 1 - 5 - In which the night's plans are nearly revealed.
Ch 1 - 6 - In which confusion sets in.
Ch 1 - 7 - In which faces and names assault the mind.
Ch 1 - 8 - In which it is time for a nap.
Ch 1 - 9 - In which there is a dark turn of events.
Ch 1 - 10 - In which all the entrants arrive.
Ch 1 - 11 - In which the contest begins.
Ch 1 - 12 - In which Jack is tested.
Ch 1 - 13 - In which the points are tallied.
Ch 1 - 14 - In which Jack is the winner of a fabulous prize.
Ch 1 - 15 - In which it is time to eat.
Ch 1 - 16 - In which Jack Ballard dies.
Ch 1 - 17 - In which the new Sombreta is born.
Ch 1 - 18 - In which Jack's tutelage begins.
Ch 1 - 19 - In which Jack does the necessary.
Ch 1 - 20 - In which Jack comes to his senses.
Ch 1 - 21 - In which bedtime approaches.
Ch 1 - 22 - In which Jack is laid to rest.
Interlude - In which Theodore arrives with impeccable style.

 

CHAPTER TWO

Ch 2 - Title
Ch 2 - 1 - In which Jack is transformed.
Ch 2 - 2 - In which friends are reunited.
Ch 2 - 3 - In which Vitus shows his fashion sense.
Ch 2 - 4 - In which Vitus does a parlor trick.
Ch 2 - 5 - In which Sombreta makes her debut.
Ch 2 - 6 - In which Vitus recycles.
Ch 2 - 7 -In which Vitus feels guilty about carbon emissions.
Ch 2 - 8 - In which Vitus reveals his dark library secret.
Ch 2 - 9 - In which there is no time for love.
Ch 2 - 10 - In which Boytown 5 is rockin' you live.
Ch 2 - 11 - In which Helen can't miss her stories.
Ch 2 - 12 - In which a bitter task is accomplished.
Ch 2 - 13 In which one shouldn't bet against a corpse's constitution.
Ch 2 - 14In which Jack passes with flying colors, or lovely gardens.
Ch 2 -15 In which we learn why Vitus' clothes are aerodynamic.
Ch 2 -16 In which vampires always buckle up for safety.
Ch 2 -17 In which teen drinking is proven to lower life expectancy.
Ch 2 -18 In which the Kingfisher presents a very special episode.
Ch 2 -19 In which Jack meets the family.
Ch 2 -20 In which Sombreta is easily impressed.
Ch 2 -21 In which the dead rest in peace, get it?! Get it?
Ch 2 -22 In which Ignatius Perrier has come to play.

 

CHAPTER THREE

Ch 3 - Title
Ch 3 -1 - In which sleeping like the dead should mean something.
Ch 3 -2 - In which Vitus is not very photogenic.
Ch 3 -3 - In which Vitus has the eye of the tiger.
Ch 3 -4 - In which shopping takes away the pain of being dead.
Ch 3 -5 - In which Helen is hot for summer.
Ch 3 -6 - In which Darren is distracted from important things.
Ch 3 -7 - In which Darren learns a Very Special Lesson.
Ch 3 -8 - In which there ain't no party like a Greyburn party.
Ch 3 -9 - In which Auberon makes the scene.
Ch 3 -10 - In which Francesca didn't get the memo about fur.
Ch 3 -11 - In which Demetri can't stand nerds.
Ch 3-12-In which Demy would rather watch You Make Me Crazy.
Ch 3-13-In which Aubrey doesn't actually know the rules of Avant.
Ch 3-14 -In which Aubrey's been saving that since the revolution.
Ch 3 -15 -In which Fran wonders if her outfit is now redundant.
Ch 3 - 16 -In which Darren is initiated.
Ch 3 - 17 -In which efficient travel is terrifying.
Ch 3 - 18 -In which it's flashback time again, weeeooohhh!
Ch 3 - 19 -In which skeletons are very pretty.
Ch 3 - 20 -In which the intricacies of hygiene are beyond Aubrey.
Ch 3 - 21 -In which that hitchhiker looks wholesome enough.
Ch 3 - 22 -In which you've got something on your ear dude.
Interlude 1 - In which Gaston Louis' stories always go like that.
Interlude 2 - In which one must bring a ball gag to the aquarium.

 

CHAPTER FOUR

Ch 4 - Title
Ch 4 - 1 -In which Jack is always worried about pyromaniacs.
Ch 4 - 2 -In which punctuation is not a vampire power.
Ch 4 - 3 -In which there's always time for a cuppa.
Ch 4-4 In which one learns trial by fire, not real fire cuz you'd die.
Ch 4 - 5 -In which Vitus gets an ultra combo.
Ch 4 - 6 -In which one sees guys and girls dancin, OOH OOH!
Ch 4 - 7 -In which babies shouldn't hang out on roofs anyway.
Ch 4 - 8 -In which Darren is not Harlan's hide and seek champion.
Ch 4 - 9 -In which allergies are a bitch.
Ch 4 - 10 -In which the moral is: don't be nice to weirdos.
Ch 4 - 11 -In which barflies failed zoology.
Ch 4 - 12 -In which vampires can be lazy stalkers.
Ch 4 - 13 -In which the party is totally alive though man!
Ch 4 - 14 -In which cutting is just a job, murder is a career.
Ch 4 - 15 -In which vampires don't get personal space.
Ch 4 - 16 -In which ethics are relative, amirite?
Ch 4 - 17 -In which trucker hats don't have to be ironic.
Ch 4 - 18 -In which Darren has a varsity jacket phobia.
Ch 4 - 19 -In which Darren accessorizes like a true Greyburn.
Ch 4 - 20 -In which enthusiasm is only for the living.
Ch 4 - 21 -In which the comic is a nonstop erotic cabaret again.
Ch 4 - 22 -In which Tomasz's lessons are heavily insured.

CHAPTER FIVE

Ch 5 - Title
Ch 5 - 1 -In which only you can prevent vampire fires.
Ch 5 - 2 - In which that cat doesn't give a damn.
Ch 5 - 3 -In which Vitus is glad that grunge is back.
Ch 5 - 4 - In which Minchin was killing when killing wasn't cool.
Ch 5 - 5 -In which a hooker ballet would be kinda interesting.
Ch 5 - 6 -In which you fill in the 'in the closet' joke.
Ch 5BONUS-In which the comic panels exploded all over the page!
Ch 5 - 7 -In which 'splut splut' is not his ringtone.
Ch 5 - 8 -In which Angela thinks life should be like fan fiction.
Ch 5 - 9 -In which which shinyness is an important feature.
Ch 5 - 10 -In which Jack's PTSD will be so bad by the end.
Ch 5 - 11 -In which everyone enjoys a public flogging.
Ch 5 - 12 -In which Jack should've just asked nicely.
Ch 5 - 13 -In which HAM does not believe in audience interaction.
Ch 5 - 14 -In which the comic goes analog.
Ch 5 - 15 -In which that's one way to comfort someone.
Ch 5 - 16 -In which mad mad lovers must pause and draw the line.
Ch 5 - 17 -In which the shipping fee has to be outrageous.
Ch 5 - 18 -In which children are always jumping out of windows.
Ch 5 - 19 -In which Jack really hates windows.
Ch 5 - 20 -In which you gotta be nude to make it a FUNhouse.
Ch 5 - 21 -In which Vitus should hang up and drive.
Ch 5 - 22 -In which a missile shouldn't be THAT hard to assemble.

 

 

CHAPTER SIX

Ch 6 - Title
Ch 6 - 1 - In which Greyburn's standards are too high.
Ch 6 - 2 - In which vampires are the # 1 cause of traffic jams.
Ch 6 - 3 - In which the symphony has lousy security.
Ch 6 - 4 - In which rudeness is subjective.
Ch 6 - 5 - In which at least HE opens the window first.
Ch 6 - 6 - In which the Circle doesn't negotiate with terrorists.
Ch 6 - 7 - In which Jack just can't stay gore-free.
Ch 6 - 7.5 - In which Sarah's got to be true to the Kru.
Ch 6 - 8 - In which Theodore could have just texted him.
Ch 6 - BONUS - In which windows are nothing but trouble.
Ch 6 - 9 - In which the rain falls hard on a humdrum town.
Ch 6 - 10 - In which Theodore shops in bulk.
Ch 6 - 11 - In which presentation is key.
Ch 6 - 12 - In which Theo needs lots of napkins.
Ch 6 - 13 - In which crafting should be respected.
Ch 6 - 14 - In which fire is pretty, so pretty.
Ch 6 - 15 - In which a well is a terrible place for doubloons.
Ch 6 - 16 - In which the comic gets as wiggy as it ever will.
Ch 6 - 17 - In which vampires really need bibs.
Ch 6 - 18 - In which butts are sooo distracting.
Ch 6 - 19 - In which that emoticon makes the page.
Ch 6 - 20 - In which shit's pretty fast, man.
Ch 6 - 21 - In which Theo watches too many '80s movies.
Ch 6 - 22 - In which Theo hates Mondays.

Ch 6 - Interlude - Theo backstory 1
Ch 6 - Interlude - Theo backstory 2

 

CHAPTER SEVEN

Ch 7 - Title
Ch 7 - 1 - In which Demy finds a modern use for a hat rack.
Ch 7 - 2 - In which it's the most comfy battle ever.
Ch 7 - 3 - In which Elsinor likes boys who bop.
Ch 7 - 4 - In which Jack has high standards for literature.
Ch 7 - 5 - In which the cock blocking keeps rocking.
Ch 7 - 6 - In which Theodore is ever creative in his transportation.
Ch 7 - 7 - In which Theodore is dead, wrapped in plastic!
Ch 7 - 8 - In which Darren is apparently not super bad.
Ch 7 - 9 - In which it is a GHOUL's night OUT! REE HEE HEE!
Ch 7 - 10 - In which 'gay buttz' becomes the comic's top search term.
Ch 7 - 11 - In which walking on the floor is soooo done.
Ch 7- 12 In which someone wants to be considerably more powerful!
Ch 7 - 13 - In which Vitus has important fancy lady hats to pack.
Ch 7 - 14 - In which that trick doesn't go over well at parties.
Ch 7 - 15 - In which the foyer isn't going to pack itself.
Ch 7 - 16 - In which it's just a fixer-upper.
Ch 7 - Interlude - Theo backstory pt. 2 - 1
Ch 7 - Interlude - Theo backstory pt. 2 - 2
Ch 7 - Interlude - Theo backstory pt. 2 - 3
Ch 7 - 17 - In which Angela does a Robert Smith impression.
Ch 7 - 18 - In which Clyde has a song for every occasion.
Ch7 -19 In which Demy looks down on SleepyTown's 2 star charm.
Ch 7 - 20 - In which in soviet Harlan, Boobers watches YOU!
Ch 7 - 21 - In which Demetri needs a better pomade.
Ch 7 - 22 - In which people used to be on fire a lot.
Ch 7 - Interlude - In which Fran thought it was still beat-down time.

INTERMISSION 1
INTERMISSION 2
INTERMISSION 3
INTERMISSION 4
INTERMISSION 5
INTERMISSION 6
INTERMISSION 7

 

 

CHAPTER EIGHT

Ch 8 - Title
Ch 8 - 1 - In which no one likes old babies.
Ch 8 - 2 - In which there was a 25% match to a smashed tomato.
Ch 8 - 3 - In which Tricky Slicky has attitude-- but attitude isn't actually everything.
Ch 8 - 4 - In which that song has a lot of notes, apparently.
Ch 8 - 5 - In which Bribeaux is known for its delights.
Ch 8 - 6 - In which Jack fights the bogeyman with politeness.
Ch 8 - 7 - In which real vampires don't use the stairs.
Ch 8 - 8 - In which white guys are pretty scary.
Ch 8 - 9 - In which Karl's 2nd line should've been "whowho-whowho!"
Ch 8 - 10 - In which Chool unspools and the written word rules.
Ch 8 - 11 - In which it was the shower's 40th birthday.
Ch 8 - 12 - In which Bifurcated Cock Gang don't run very fast.
Ch8-13 In which Allison doesn't love the nightlife, and mustn't boogie.
Ch 8 - 14 - In which you don't want to know about fairy munchies.
Ch 8 - 15 - In which the comic gets "fun" again.
Ch 8 - 16 - In which I must not make a sunglasses at night joke.
Ch 8 - 17 - In which vampires are actually not very caliente.
Ch 8 - 18 - In which gold is better for teeth than for dicks.
Ch 8 - 19 - In which my jokes have the same effect on people :(
Ch 8 - 20 - In which Jack feels uninvited in his own home.
Ch 8 - 21 - In which Tristan did WHAT???
Ch 8 - 22 - In which Tristan and Jack conserve water.
Ch 8 - 23 - In which Tristan's got The Power.
Ch 8 - 24 - In which Jack performs a hands-on investigation.
Ch 8 - 25 - In which this comic needs more pratfalls.
Ch 8 - 26 - In which the Kingfisher needs Robert Stack to narrate.
Ch 8 - 27 - In which Jack gets clowned.

CHAPTER NINE

Ch 9 - Title
Ch 9 - 1 - In which the parlor has half the rat shit, twice the fun!
Ch 9 - 2 - In which Jack catches the red eye.
Ch 9 - 3 - In which that meal looks a little underdone.
Ch 9 - 4 - In which Jack 'all-goned' his dinner!
Ch 9 - 5 - In which Theodore hangs up the 'do not disturb' sign.
Ch 9 - 6 - In which ghouls gotta ghoul.
Ch 9 - 7 - In which the Lawd must grant Olga His mimbo.
Ch 9 - 7.25 - In which Demy walks the streets at night, he goes where brown bats dare.
Ch 9 - 7.5 - In which Claude just don't know.
Ch 9 - 7.75 - In which Karl uses lots of thumbtacks.
Ch 9 - 7.99 - In which the crowboys are summoned to the Elemental Plane of Fluorescence.
Ch 9 - 8 - In which ghoulish eyes are shining.
Ch 9 - 9 - In which Minnie doesn't really want to meet local singles.

Ghoul House 1 In which young Jack uses workahol to pay for his alcohol.
Ghoul House 2 In which Demy tells Jack how to pull off that hoo ride.
Ghoul House 3 In which Tabby wants to see Jack's cat style.
Ghoul House 4 In which Cat Style gets too curious.


Ch 9 - 10 - In which the snake's name is Mr. Lengthy.
Ch 9 - 11 - In which Fran gets feminine wiled.
Ch 9 - 12 - In which Lucricia releases the bats.

Vitus Investigates 1 - In which Vitus gets gum stuck to his shoe.
Vitus Investigates 2 - In which the gum gets sticky.
Vitus Investigates 3 - In which the gum gets hard.
Vitus Investigates 4 - In which the gum gets scraped up and chewed again.
Vitus Investigates 5 - In which the gum loses its flavor.

Ch 9 - 13 - In which Olga drops the bombaroo on us.
Ch 9 - 14 - In which yelling at computers makes them sad.
Ch 9 - 15 - In which the flying catsup spaghetti monster appears.
Ch 9 - 16 - In which Darren knows all about local species, yo.
Ch 9 - 17 - In which smoking kills, har har har.
Ch 9 - 18 - In which darlings are killed.
Ch 9 - 19 - In which Claude gets dyspepsia.
Ch 9 - 20 - In which gnomes wardrobe is supplied by Oshkosh B'gosh.
Ch 9 - 21 - In which good help is so hard to ~fiend~ ... REEHEEHEE
Ch 9 - 22 - In which Demetri finds himself in the shadow play.
Ch 9 - 23 - In which there are discos and infernos, but never the twain shall meet.
Ch 9 - 24 - In which Vitus has had the hardest day ever.
Ch 9 - 25 - In which Demy's all 'Quit Playin' Games with mah Heaarrrt.'
Ch 9 - 26 - In which Jack learned all the dirty words.
Ch 9 - Denouement - In which the rat hat strikes back.

 

 

CHAPTER 9.5

Ch 9.5 - 1 - In which Karl gets mashed.
Ch 9.5 - 2 - In which Karl thinks he's too good for Noodle Cup.
Ch 9.5 - 3 - In which the Grey Menace gets menaced.
Ch 9.5 - 4 - In which Dr. PinkPink offers sage advice.
Ch 9.5 - 5 - In which Jack is the cool one... because he's dead!
Ch 9.5 - 6 - In which color is a very recent invention.
Ch 9.5 - 7 - In which Karl's crappy kissing makes her PUKE!
Ch 9.5 - 8 - In which you mustn't muss Shaunessy's hair.
Ch 9.5 - 9 - In which the pumpkin half is the top one, luckily.
Ch 9.5 - 10 - In which they're missing the best part of the movie.
Ch 9.5- 11 - In which Jack struts over the rainbow and into our hearts.
Ch 9.5- 12 - In which Jack's jacket is a symbol of his individuality, and belief in personal freedom.
Ch 9.5- 13 - In which you shouldn't do drugs or you'll die and turn into an undead, for real.
Ch 9.5- 14 - In which cocaine is a luxury these days.
Ch 9.5- 15 - In which Jack's got to make him express himself HEY HEY HEY HEY.
Ch 9.5- 16 - In which the boys take the safety off the pin.
Ch 9.5- 17 - In which DuckBear is the majestic sport of kings.
Ch 9.5- 18 - In which rainbow is the color of righteous indignation.
Ch 9.5- 19 - In which it's DOCTOR Curly Fry to you, bub.
Ch 9.5- 20 - In which Jack takes 'stay in touch' literally! HEY O!
Ch 9.5- 21 - In which sleep is for weenies.

 

CHAPTER TEN


Ch 10 - TITLE
Ch 10 - 01 In which Theo unlocks the secret level.
Ch 10 - 02 In which steam cleaning works wonders.
Ch 10 - 03 In which it's good to stock up on virgin's blood when it's on sale.
Ch 10 - 04 In which being broke as a joke ain't funny.
Ch 10 - 05 In which Karl gets a journalism boner.
Guest Comic by Christopher - Pt. 1 In which haber is dashed against the rocks of punk.
Guest Comic by Christopher - Pt. 2 In which brutal police get brutalized.
Guest Comic by Christopher - Pt. 3 In which GLOBAL CHAOSSSSss does its thing.
Guest Comic by Christopher - Pt. 4 In which Sketchy Mark makes his only appearance.
Ch 10 - 06 In which there really is such a thing as too many noodles.
Ch 10 - 07 In which Molly socializes.
Ch 10 - 08 In which a sex pervert is the best pervert.
Ch 10 - 09 In which Karl is lost in the Labyrinth.
Ch 10 - 10 In which a witch's teat is pretty cool.
Ch 10 - 11 In which frat boys ruin everything.
Ch 10 - 12 In which no one is down with the clown.
Ch 10 - 13 In which Minchin busts a move.
Ch 10 - 14 In which Minchin is cute too, but in his own way.
Ch 10 - 15 In which Allison is haunted by the ghost of spywarez past.
Ch 10 - 16 In which hot lead turns into cold steel.
Ch 10 - 17 In which everything is okay and not weird.
Ch 10 - 18 In which Jack and Karl must keep their tongues inside the ride at all times.
Ch 10 - 19 In which the pizza is the life.
Ch 10 - 20 In which one of these honeys Darren's got to creep on.
Ch 10 - 21 In which Vitus shows a little tough love.
Ch 10 - 22 In which Vitus really hates Jack's neck.
Ch 10 - 23 In which Vitus is a heartbreaker.
Ch 10 - Denouement In which the gang takes in the trash.

 

 

CHAPTER ELEVEN


Ch 11 - TITLE
Ch 11 - 01 In which Allison's gonna take you down to clown town.
Ch 11 - 02 In which Allison is up to bat.
Ch 11 - 03 In which burlap is the hot look for spring.
Ch 11 - 04 In which Claude gives up his nudist ways... for now.
Ch 11 - 05 In which Francesca overcomes the familial nerd hate.
Ch 11 - Arsonella Pt 1 In which Arsonella rocks the occult underworld.
Ch 11 - Arsonella Pt 2 What did they do with the baby?
Ch 11 - 06 In which Claude is a bad motor-scooter.
Ch 11 - Thierry's Inferno I In which hell is other demons.
Ch 11 - Thierry's Inferno II In Allison whacks the vice squad.
Ch 11 - 07 In which bright-eyes turns around.
Ch 11 - 08 In which Clyde's momma didn't raise no fool.
Ch 11 - 09 In which the puzzles are set to difficult and monsters to easy.
Ch 11 - 10 In which Demetri is up to bat.
Ch 11 - 11 In which Darren checks out.
Ch 11 - 12 In which Jack has enchanting tits.
Ch 11 - 13 In which one good job deserves another.
Ch 11 - 14 In which Allison stomps on the pious.
Ch 11 - 15 In which The Kingfisher gets on the road again, like a John Denver song, or a taxi full of vampires, work with us here.
Ch 11 - 16 In which Karl's face is squeezably soft.

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